


Sunflower, Raise Your Heavy Head and Face the Sun!

by ObliqueOptimism



Series: Bad Things Happen Bingo [5]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Bad Things Happen Bingo, Brain Damage, Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Not Beta Read, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-04-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:34:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23158615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObliqueOptimism/pseuds/ObliqueOptimism
Summary: Memory [noun]mem·o·ry | \ ˈmem-rē  , ˈme-mə- \pluralmemories1a:the power or process of reproducing or recalling what has been learned and retained especially through associative mechanismsb:the store of things learned and retained from an organism's activity or experience as evidenced by modification of structure or behavior or by recall and recognition2a:commemorative remembranceb:the fact or condition of being remembered3a:a particular act of recall or recollectionb:an image or impression of one that is rememberedc:the time within which past events can be or are remembered
Relationships: Dave/Klaus Hargreeves
Series: Bad Things Happen Bingo [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1603255
Comments: 43
Kudos: 256





	1. The Sunflower Tilts Towards The Sun

**Author's Note:**

> sorry not sorry y'all
> 
> bad things bingo: brain damage

He was at a rave. No surprise there. But the pain was new, his head hurt, his body ached. He felt like he’s well past his usual come down, but to be this far into the rave, the middle of all the bodies and the lights and drugs and still feel like this? But his head _hurt_ and Ben was there, talking and yelling over the pulse of the music. Gesturing.

As per usual, when Klaus is too confused to know what is happening, he did as Ben dictates.

He left the rave, hoping that he’d taken something while he was there and it hadn’t hit yet.

The cool night air made him shiver as he stepped out, following Ben. 

He has gaps in his memory but that was nothing new. Too used to the feeling of suddenly being somewhere he hadn’t been before, not sure what he’s done or what’s been done to him. He usually either asks Ben or he pauses for a time and takes stock of his body and all that is new from last he remembered.

He started with that.

His head hurt _a lot_. Reaching to the back of it, he gave a hiss when he touched a very sore spot, fingers coming away with some blood. Again, nothing too new there. He’d been pushed and shoved around enough that it wasn’t unheard of for him to hit his head against the harsh brick wall or the dirty metal of a dumpster and come away from it bleeding, Ben worried about a concussion. 

As far as the rest of his body went, he felt like he was sober. Or on his way to it. No question. The shivering, shaking, his insides twisted, crying out for drugs to make it better. Whatever he took at the rave should hit his system soon.

The fact that he got this far into sobriety and couldn’t remember what came before waking up on the floor of the rave should worry him more than it did, but then he might have a concussion. Which _could_ explain the memory loss.

“C’mon man, we gotta get back to the Academy, get you checked over. Make sure Luther made it back,” Ben said, worry in his tone and a hand behind Klaus’s back as if they could touch.

But Klaus stopped walking, not letting Ben guide him anymore. He frowned deeply, shivering as Ben went through him. Why would they go back to the _Academy_? And Luther? He was on the moon still, nothing to get back to. 

Right?

_Right?_

Ben please confirm.

_Ben please confirm._

“What day is Klaus?” Ben asked urgently, _“The day?”_

How should he know? Ben always took care of the date for him. He only needed to know the time of the year. The rest of it didn’t matter. Day of the week? Number on the calendar? _It didn’t matter_. Why was Ben looking at him like that. Why was this happening. _It never mattered the date before when he snorted coke off the rim of a dumpster_ so why should it now?

“You may not know the day anyway,” Ben muttered to himself, saying something about how _time travel_ wouldn’t at all help him remember the date. Klaus hadn’t thought about time travel much beyond that morning that Five ran away, _why_ Ben would be suggesting _Klaus_ time traveled?

Maybe Klaus hit his head worse than he thought or the drugs have hit and it’s a bad trip. That has to be it. He’s having a bad trip. The pain is from whatever it was he took was laced with, Ben talking as if _Klaus_ time traveled and Five and Luther not being at the moon was just hallucinations.

And the ghosts at the edge of his vision were also part of the hallucination.

He wasn’t sober.

He hadn’t time traveled.

Luther was still on the moon.

He had no reason to go back to the Academy.

“Calm down, breathe, okay? Klaus, just breathe for a moment,” Ben coached. “You’re not having a bad trip,” his tone was gentle.

But that’s what had to be happening. There was no other explanation. He hadn’t-- He hadn’t _time traveled_. He’d remember that. He’d remember that? 

Wouldn’t he?

“You’d hit your head really hard in there. Maybe you’ve got some sort of amnesia,” Ben sat down, Klaus followed.

Sitting felt better. 

“Good, that’s good, Klaus,” Ben said. “Okay, let’s take this slowly?”

He nodded for a half second before realizing that made his head hurt more. He didn’t have amnesia did he? That wasn’t a real thing. Not that happened to real people? Sure, he lived a weird life but amnesia was a step too far. 

“Maybe it’ll come back,” Ben shrugged. “Sometimes it does right? You’ll remember Dave again.”

_Who the fuck was Dave?_

Ben looked distraught. He cleared his throat, “Alright. You don’t remember Dave at all. Do you remember Five coming back? Dad dying?”

No. 

No.

No.

No.

How much had he lost? Five was back? Reggie was dead? _Who was Dave?_

“We really need to get you home so someone can look at you,” Ben said, not moving to get up. He only watched Klaus, worried. “Do you think you can make it back to the Academy?”

Of course he could. He hadn’t forgotten the way. He’d maybe forgotten a lot but he hadn’t forgotten his nightmare childhood. He’d rather forget that than this Dave person, based on the tone that Ben gave when saying his name.

As if Dave was something-- _someone_ special.

“He was.”

Was? He left Klaus? Made sense. The only reason why Ben had stayed is because he was dead.

“So is Dave,” Ben said. “You uh-- you met him when time traveling. Said you were gone for ten months. You came back after he died and you’re getting sober for him.”

Him? _Klaus Hargreeves_ getting sober for this Dave person? Hilarious. What a good joke. As if he’d get sober for someone. For a ghost. Ben should start doing some stand up. He’d make a killing.

This was just an elaborate prank Ben was playing on him. Trying to get Klaus to get sober, making up a long lost love who’d died at war, alongside him.

“I didn’t mention the war,” Ben whispered.

Klaus reached up and grabbed dog tags.

_Dave Katz_

Why was he crying?

“Do you remember him?” Ben asked. “Is it coming back?”

_No._

Nothing.

Just a feeling of loss, deep inside him. 

Would this be his life now? Mourning someone he couldn’t remember?

“You’ll remember him again,” Ben said. “We’ll get mom to look at you. She’ll do something medical and then you’ll remember him.”

He can’t go to mom. She’s at the Academy, where Reggie was and then Reggie would take him.

“No, I told you. Dad died. Heart attack, but Luther thinks one of us murdered him.”

Klaus snorted. Luther would think that. But Ben was right, he should get someone to look over him. Grace would work. And it would be a good way to check and make sure Ben was telling the truth. If he went to the Academy and Reggie was gone, everyone else back, then knew it was true. That he’d time traveled, that he lost Dave.

That he was getting sober for Dave.

He forced himself into standing again, leaning against a wall. Sharing a look with Ben, he started the long way back to the Academy. 

When he got there he didn’t see anyone. He heard Luther and a girl giggling from his room, so that fit with what Ben had been telling him. Klaus wished he had a giggling girl waiting for him in his room. More's the pity. 

No, but when he did step into his room he saw a man waiting for him, soldier clothes and a gunshot in his chest.

He wondered if that was Dave.

His smile was like the sun.


	2. And The Sun Smiles Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise! have some more of this.

Klaus, his sunflower, could see him. Dave smiled at him, so happy to be seen again. He’d waited for this moment, to be reunited with his love. He knew that not even death could keep them apart. He’d make a comment about how cheesy that made their relationship but at the moment he was too happy to find the words.

And then his smile faltered.

Sunny didn’t greet him, he looked confused, _hurt_ , he tilted his head as if he was unsure who was in front of him. Like he didn’t recognize his sunshine.

Klaus asked if he was Dave. Because he didn’t recognize him. He said he was sorry. He’s very pretty. Sorry that he got shot. Sorry that he didn’t remember him. He didn’t remember much right now. He hit his head you see.

Dave had forgotten how Klaus, when feeling vulnerable would apologize. He’d taught him to never be sorry for who he was. “It’s okay, sunny.”

Why’d he just call him sunny? Like his son? Did they have a daddy kink going on? Klaus was so unsure of what was happening. But he was reaching out as if he wanted to be held like Dave always did, even though he couldn’t remember.

Dave let out a sad laugh, making Klaus look hurt, “You’re my sunflower. Sunny for short. And um--” he cleared his throat, “you call me sunshine. Sunny for short.”

So silly, both of them being sunny for short. Klaus had always said that Dave was like the sunshine to him, something he’d never had enough of growing up but always made him happy, made him smile, made him feel warm. Inside and out. 

“Yeah,” Dave agreed, trying to keep his voice from wavering. _“Inside and out.”_

It was odd, how Klaus had these _feelings_ without knowing why he felt them, he was so used to being numb but he was sober now, wasn’t he? Think he could have some pain meds? Help with his come down, help with his head injury.

Dave reached out slightly, “Can I see?” The head injury seemed like it had bled some, there was drying blood on the back of his neck that Dave could see from the front. That’s not a good sign, the blood. Sure, head injuries tended to bleed more but it was still worrisome. “I just want to see how bad it is, sunny. You should get someone to check you out. You’re missing--” Dave took in a deep breath, “you’re missing at least a year of memories.”

Klaus shrugged, seemingly uncaring. As if it wasn’t important, his memories not important, _as if Klaus wasn’t important_. 

“But you are,” Dave said. “You are _so important._ ”

His sunflower flinched, flinched away from his sunshine. Sunflowers should turn their head to the sunshine, not turn away. 

“We should go see mom, or Pogo,” Ben said, stepping forward towards them. He’d been watching their reunion quietly. Dave was thankful for that, Klaus turned and hissed at Ben, less thankful. Klaus thought he was fine, he’d be fine, he’s had worse.

“That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get help now,” Dave whispered. 

Klaus glanced at both of them then gave a nod followed by a wince. They helped as best they could, but they were two ghosts trying to help an injured man stumble around his childhood home looking for his mom. Sunny giggled at the idea, Dave wasn’t sure what exactly was so funny, his love was hurt. Klaus was badly hurt, missing much of himself, with his memories gone. What? Did Klaus _change_ while at war, would Dave no longer love him now that he was _this mess_ again.

“I love you, sunny. Just because you don’t remember our time together doesn’t change how much I care for you,” Dave said. “And I won’t give up on you because of it. No matter what happens, sunflower, _I love you._ ”

But Dave couldn’t mean that.

Klaus was an unlovable creature.

Maybe the one he knew,

Who had been to war,

Maybe he was _worthy_ ;

But not now

_he was broken you see_

No, Dave shouldn’t cry. Sunshine wasn’t supposed to cry. He was sorry, _sorry_ , he didn’t mean it. He didn’t mean it. He didn’t--

“Klaus? Darling?” Grace’s voice rang out, she walked up to Klaus, leaning against a wall, repeating how sorry he was. “What’s going on?”

Withdrawal, hit his head, _amnesia_.

“Amnesia?” Grace questioned.

“He’s missing a year,” Dave said, even though he knew Grace couldn’t hear him. But Klaus was missing a year. It had to be said.

“A year? Come with me, darling,” Grace wrapped an arm around Klaus and helped him towards the infirmary.

She looked him over, asking questions on what he remembered, how he felt, did he know what happened? Ben did? What does Ben say? He fell, _a fight_ , saved Luther? Well wasn’t he just the little hero she knew he always was. Of course he was useful, _of course_. Why would he think he wasn’t? He was more than his father said.

Dave and Ben agreed with Grace.

But Sunny, he said he knew he was a _disappointment_. He hadn’t lived up to his _potential_. He _knew_ that. It felt fresh, this knowledge.

“Whoever told you that is a liar,” Dave said. “You are none of those things. You are brave, sunny. A beautiful soul, just as you are.”

“Klaus, darling, your heartbeat has sped up, is everything okay?” Grace asked, worried.

Don’t worry, he was fine. A very nice ghost was giving him compliments. No, it wasn’t Ben, it was someone who smiled at him like the sun would. A ghost who knew him, but he didn’t know the ghost. _Yes_ , the amnesia. It was shitty because he wished he knew the ghost. He _felt_ like he knew the ghost. Memories locked away? May come back? May not? What good is that diagnosis? 

“We need to inform your siblings,” Grace said, frowning.

Klaus thought that was a dumb idea. What would they care anyway? It’s not like anything changed. He was still his drug addicted whore self. For them he only forgot about a week, not a year. The nice ghost spoke of time travel and war. Had to be a lie, right? No way would he survive the Vietnam war.

Dave pointed out his new scars, his new tattoos, Dave’s dog tags. Klaus couldn’t ignore that, the facts were there. He’d changed, he’d been gone for ten months. It was important, his amnesia was important. “Your family should know, sunflower. They can help you.”

Only when he was presented with one of his siblings, he had put up a wall, a fake smile, said nothing of his amnesia. If they questioned his lack of knowledge, he said it was drugs. Speaking of drugs, he wanted some. 

“I’ll miss you,” Dave said sadly. He understood, of course he did, he always had. But he’d miss talking to Klaus. He’d go away if Klaus took drugs, as he was mostly sober now, he was able to be seen but not if Klaus took anything. Klaus stared at him, looking pained. But Klaus didn’t want to lose him, not more than he already had. _Please don’t leave him again._ “I won’t, sunflower. I won’t leave your side, I promise.”

Whatever Klaus did, Dave wouldn’t leave him. He loved him.

And then, in the morning, around the large brother and the small brother, Grace decided to check in with Klaus since it had been a few hours since he saw her. She didn’t drag him away to the infirmary, looking at him in the kitchen, around the others who didn’t seem too worried about their brother. Not until Grace said, “Has any of your memories come back?”

“What do you mean?” the small one demanded, voice sharp. Sunny flinched.

“Klaus hit his head yesterday,” Grace answered. “He has amnesia.Oh dear, it also looks like someone had their hands around your throat, based on the bruising. I wonder if that is who gave you the head wound.”

The large one paled, _“What?”_

Klaus didn’t know, it’s not like he remembered who had their hands around his neck. But it wasn’t unusual, don’t worry about that part. He’s fine, throat doesn’t even hurt. His bruises will fade, ha! Like his memory did, huh?

“Sunny, please don’t joke about that,” Dave asked quietly. He knew Klaus often joked about himself and his hardships as a way to cope, but he was joking about not remembering his sunshine and it hurt. 

The child looked pained, “Amnesia. _Shit._ You said you were missing a year? That would include your time travel then.”

“What time travel?” 

“When my former colleagues came looking for me they took Klaus and he took their briefcase. He said he was gone for ten months. Didn’t say where,” the child shrugged, as if it wasn’t important. As if Dave wasn’t important.

The large one frowned, “He didn’t time travel.”

Klaus shrunk down on himself, hiding. The two siblings started bickering, about Klaus. How trustworthy he was, how the kid saw the signs of time travel, why would Five believe someone like Klaus, didn’t see know what he was like, why did Luther not trust Five’s evaluation of their brother, shut up, both of you shut up, shut up, _everyone just shut up_

please

shut up.

His head hurt, he was sober, he was missing part of himself, he knew he loved someone and lost him, Dave was standing right beside him, he thought-- _he knew_ that Dave had died in his arms, but he didn’t remember him, he just felt love towards this nice ghost who he didn’t know, and it was a lot

_it was a lot_ okay.

“You expect us to believe you’re sober?” Luther snorted. “You were at that rave, same as me.”

That caught Five’s attention, “ _You went to a rave?_ Do you know what happened to him? How he got those bruises around his neck? How he hit his head? _Luther_ , what happened?”

After some prodding, Luther said he didn’t know. He was drunk, he got high. He doesn’t remember. Ha, maybe the amnesia is catching, eh Luther?

“Luther gave you the bruises,” Ben said, voice cold. “He was drunk, you tried to console him and he picked you up by your throat and then threw you across the room when you couldn’t talk to dad like he wanted.”

“What the fuck?” Dave growled out, upset that sunny’s brother would do that to him.

“And then you saved him at the rave from being attacked and you hit your head,” Ben continued. “Tell them, Klaus.”

Ben says--

“Don’t you _dare_ bring Ben into this,” Luther pointed at Klaus.

Klaus hunkered down, something Dave had seen a number of times in ‘Nam, ready for yelling, ready to be told he was worthless, ready to be shot down figuratively and literally. Dave didn’t like that it was sunflower’s brothers making him react this way. That wasn’t right. Family shouldn’t beat you down like this, _especially_ if you were already injured.

Grace finished her assessment, “You should go upstairs after eating a simple breakfast and rest some more, dear. That head wound is not good, you need to take it easy today and not run around with your siblings. I know you’re excited that Five is back, but you boys can’t roughhouse today like when you were kids.”

With that, she made him an easy breakfast that he poked at before she ushered him upstairs. 

The argument Five and Luther was having about him had continued as he ate as well as when he left. Klaus didn’t seem to think anything of it, neither did Ben, but Dave did. Dave would remember for his love. Whenever Klaus couldn’t or wouldn’t remember, Dave would.

Klaus laid down on his bed, he patted beside and Dave followed suit, making sure none of his ghostly self touched Klaus. Klaus turned to him, asked how they met. What was their first kiss like? Did Klaus fulfill Dave’s needs in bed? It was all he knew how to do, relationship wise, so he hoped he could at least do that part right.

So Dave started to talk, about how they met, how their relationship grew. How much he grew to love Klaus _so quickly_. And then, Dave mentioned Saigon and Klaus smiled softly

and said,

_“We kissed at the disco.”_

Dave beamed at him, sunshine shimmering down to the sunflower.

“We kissed at the disco.”

**Author's Note:**

> obliqueoptimism @ tumblr

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Lethe's Bramble](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26011705) by [noodlerdoodler](https://archiveofourown.org/users/noodlerdoodler/pseuds/noodlerdoodler)




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